Snot, slobber & shit.

Well mum life isn’t how glamorous it looks on films or pictures. A day isn’t complete unless you’re covered in shit, snot or slobber.

I don’t know what’s worse, the wipe slipping when changing a shitty nappy or someone asking you what’s on your clothes and it turns out to be your child’s snot or dinner.

I’m forever asking myself why I bother washing my clothes as when I do, they’re covered in something new. I’m terrible for wiping the slobber off my son’s face and wiping my hand on my jeans. My own fault I know.

Poonarmys are real things and they happen more than you can imagine. You can never be prepared for these. I’m dreading the day my son shits in the bath. Like what will I do? Do I empty the bath? Take my son out the bath or what? I suppose I’ll cross that hurdle when it comes to it.

People say they wouldn’t let their children have snot on their faces… what they don’t realise is no baby likes their nose being wiped and they quite clearly enjoy the taste of it. You wipe their face and there’s snot there again, like how? How is that even possible?

I guess I’m yet to see a mum with all her shit together and has a spotless baby 24.7 because in my eyes, there’s no such thing.

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